THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE IS JUST A SHOT AWAY
My favourite story about Charlie Watts is that apparently during the recording of one of the Rolling Stones’ less celebrated albums in the mid-1970s, he was, er, exploring the further reaches of pharmaceutical assistance and was sleeping the effects off on the floor of the studio. He was woken up by Keith Richards who told […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE IS IMMUNE TO CONSOLIDATION
Hello, hello, happy Wednesday, hope your Augusts are proceeding well and that The Corn Wall is all you wished it to be. I would very much doubt many of you were camping, which means you avoided getting a tents, nervous headache last week. I suspect that when travel properly opens up then the UK will […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE IS FLOCKING RESILIENT
The summer lull is upon us, then, and many of you will exhibit tried and true migratory patterns as you head for a magical place known only to the top socioeconomic decile of the population as The Corn Wall. Exactly what it is about the corn, or the wall, that leads so many urban-dwellers to […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE WILL ACCEPT A CHICKEN DINNER IF THAT’S ALL THERE IS
Before we begin, might I please beg of you to spend just a few minutes rating how your platforms have done in Q2 2021? It’s been a big quarter for a lot of them, and this forms at least part of the report card for many. Free summary playback for all respondents. You can find […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE ISN’T EVEN REMOTELY SURPRISED
They say it’s the hope that kills you, but if you started out without any in the first place then you can just raise a weary eyebrow and carry on. It’s a bit like when Calvin is happier that he got a ‘C’ than an ‘A’ in his maths test, because if he keeps everyone’s […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE IS 35 YARDS OUT
So there you are, not much to do really, edging forward towards the centre circle to see if you can get in shot and improve the value of your image rights, when all of a sudden bad things happen, you’re all tangled up in the net and you’re the subject of remorseless memes like this […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE CAN BOOGIE
It is a truth universally acknowledged that I know exactly nothing about foopball; it’s the wrong shaped ball for this particular egg-chaser. Being Scottish, this is normally not an issue when major tournaments roll around, but this year is different. First, we seem inexplicably to have made it through to whatever this stage of the […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE IS CONTENT
Welcome, willkommen, bienvenue to the middle of your week; we’ve been expecting you. It’s a funny old week this week – not ha ha funny, you understand, more crippling existential angst funny – what with those of you in That England having a bank holiday and also a fiery celestial omen giving off unnatural heat. […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE IS RIGHT-SIZED
Right, now pay attention. We’ll get to the usual Update in a moment, but instead of the usual whimsy to ease you into your lunchtime, I’ve got an important announcement. Ready? WE’RE HIRING! Inexplicably, more and more clients seem to like what we do, and so we need to extend the cat basket. We’ve got […]
THE TOP CLASS WEDNESDAY UPDATE TAKES ITS DUTIES SERIOUSLY
And it’s lovely and all that, and I’m glad for the publicans and the restauranteurs, but can I just make it clear right now that anyone trying to engage in wanton hugging round here will be given such an Edinburgh lemon-sooking hard stare that even Donald Dewar himself would have recoiled. Ho, ho. Just kidding. […]
